A Little Less Sixteen

HAPPY BIRTHDAY EIJASTER

Yeah,that says it all,no?
Happy Sixteenth Birthday,though you don't look 16 (because your face mcm budak kecik yang handsome) but you act like an old man and yeah,you really are taller than you were when we were thirteen.Screw you,after measuring our heights like,a month ago,you've grown like,7 inches since 07! What about me? just a measly 2 inches -.- its alright,its okay haha
Again,happy birthday.Even though you said you didn't want anything (budget modest lah tu),I'll get you something anyways but I cant promise you when :)

Screw You

Not a good day.Not a good day at all.
Couldn't sleep soundly,tossed and turn.Stupid cold.
Woke up around 3am,remembered I was mad at Irfan.Made me more restless.
Couldn't go back to sleep,so I sat outside and watched TV by myself.
Flicked through the channels,till I came across this Japanese horror movie.
fuckfuckfuck,the remote control was stuck.Panicked for a few seconds but finally,it started working again.Tuned into Disney Channel and watched Hannah Montana for a good 30-minutes.I think I fell asleep somewhere between 6am and woke up around 9am.I glanced at my cell,and I instantly felt,I dont know?Down?Yan didnt reply my message,figures.So,got my lazy butt off the couch and made my way to the holy kitchen.Made myself a bowl of Maggi and drank iced tea while reading the latest series of the Private novels.Juicy,much?Damn,sometimes I wished I really was one of the upper-east side girls,toting a Chloe' purse and clicking my Jimmy Choo heels.Reality check,I'm not.Around 1030am,my cell blinked and got a message from Irfan.Okay,one fight down,another to go.So,had lunch at Maktok's then went out to have a manicure and pedicure in Bangsar (note my previous post),had a family dinner somewhere in Bangsar.So,here I am again.Laptop on my bed,pillows all around me,blanket thrown on the floor.Why?Here's why.I felt nauseous in the car,too much mango juice i think.Got home,changed into my Bart Simpsons tee and a pair of shorts and lay down.Then,oh geez,I just had to check my mail and see who's online.So yeah,Irfan said Hi,so did Zain and Hazwani (am trying my best to convince her everything's gonna be alright).So,I logged on to my Myspace account.Yan once told me he had a feeling I liked to stalk his page.So I did it,stalk his page,I mean.And yeah,was I shocked to not see MY adorable face at position number 2 on his top friends list.Ok,maybe not so because,well,Yan's not on mine,anymore.But come on,that doesnt mean anything kan?So NOW i think I know why he's not replying my messages.Maybe if it is because of that,how,idk.I've nothing to say,nothing at all.I dont want to think about it.Screw the world right now.Screw everyone.Okay,dont screw Zain,because he said my "ass is wicked" hahahah,awesome (!)

Okay,I'm in no mood to blog anymore,for now lah.
Ciao,Heartbreakers

Al-Fatihah,

"Cherish every single second you have with loved ones"

After what happened yesterday,it got me thinking.
A girl so young,well-liked by her peers,is gone
Just like that.
Yeah,I wasn't one of the lucky ones though,I never really knew her.
A few "hi's" here and there
But to tell you the truth,the first few weeks my friends and I saw her,
We passed her for someone who,was,not nice,yknow?
How wrong was I,how selfish was I,how ignorant was I?
I'm overwhelmed with a myriad of feelings right now.
Guilt,Shame,Anger,Sadness.
Why am I guilty?Because I used to say ugly things about her behind her back and you don't know how sorry I am right now,how awful I'm feeling right now.
Stupid,stupid,stupid Aishah.
When Irfan told me about what happened,about the accident
My body,surprisingly enough,shook so bad
I couldnt touch my French toast anymore nor drink my juice.
I told him it wasn't funny to kid me like this.
But i found out he was being dead serious after I called Ilya and Yan.
A wave of sadness washed over me
Why now?Why her?The answer to it was simple of course,Allah loves her more.
Honestly,on the ride home,I mentally kicked myself.
I felt so bad and somehow i felt as if a part of me had been taken away.
Yeah,you could say I'm being dramatic,screw you.
But its true,I never really got to know her and that's what's been bugging me ever since.
Arwah was liked by her peers,alot.And I feel as if I was left out because of my selfish mind.
I read Syakir's blog,and like a reflex,i instantly started to bawl my eyes out.
I saw Areena's page and felt for her,to lose a bestfriend to a car accident's bad enough.
I feel for her family,her brothers,Harriz too.Her friends,as well.
Allah loves her more,Al-Fatihah

May You Rest In Peace,Farah Hani